Tag: relationships

How to deal with depression

This is the second part of Depression and Life Experiences.

If you miss the first part here is the link: http://joseylifeline.com/depression-and-life-experiences/

How to deal with your depression?

Depression is not something that quickly goes away.

What you need to realize is that this situation that you are going through is not unique to you, and you cannot let it dictate your life.

Let’s talk about you on the job:

– There are always options: if you really do not like your job start exploring your options. Life Coaches or Mentors are always a good way to get help when exploring career options.

– Forget what people say about you. You alone know what you are capable of . If you need to broaden your knowledge or improve your skills do so, but do not let anybody pull you down.

– You have a gift or service to provide and only you can do this.

– Ask for help. If your boss or supervisor says you need to improve then find out what is required and how they can help you.

– Remember on the job you are providing a service in exchange for payment (your salary), if you really like the job then start providing a good service. It is like being in business for yourself.

– We were all given the same amount of skills and talents; the difference is how we use them, so use your skills and talents wisely.

– Whatever you think of yourself is what you will get back, so take a check of your thoughts on the job – are these preventing people from engaging in good professional relationships with you? If you think you are not smart, more intelligent than anyone else, do not need anybody’s help etc. that is what you will get back.

– Do not wait for your boss/manager/supervisor to give you feedback go to them and discuss your performance and ways to improve.

– It is always better to be honest about your dealings, if you make a mistake admit it, learn from it and move on.

– If you have targets explore creative ways to increase your client base. Customers love when Sales Reps can help them achieve their business goals, so make an action plan and start exploring ways to help your customer. This will not only maintain that account but can also generate referrals.

Your other life experiences

– Dealing with death is always very depressing. No one wants to see a loved one or pet move on. The person who died may have been ill and in pain and we have to acknowledge that the pain has ended for them. Sometimes we do not know why they died, so we have to have faith that it was their time to leave this world. After all they may not even want us to be depressed. They may want us to continue with our lives. The best thing is to remember the good times that you had with them.

– There are many things that can cause you to fail when trying to achieve your goals. Here are a couple of reasons:

o What you are trying to achieve, is this your purpose? If this is not your true purpose you may struggle to achieve it, so find your true purpose. What do you like doing that brings a smile to your face or that you think about all the time?

o Are you grateful for the opportunities you have been given or are you complaining and grumbling, because you are not satisfied with what you have. It always helps to be grateful on a daily basis for all that you have.

o Are you using you skills and talents wisely? Skills and talents are for serving others. It is in service to others that you reap the benefits. Whether we have our own business or we work for someone we all are serving somebody.

o Are you committed and focus on your goals? Behavior never lies. Whatever efforts you put into your goals, that is exactly what you will get back. It does not make sense to say ‘You want to lose weight’ and you exercise whenever you feel, or you want a better life and you do the same thing the same way every day. In addition to commitment and focus to your goals you also need discipline.

– Relocating can be a real issue if it is not planned properly. If you have relocated it makes sense to get involved with groups – community/church/professional.

Whilst this would not provide you with the same comfort level at your previous location, it is a starting point to build a circle of friends quickly. Also whatever little rituals you had at home try to maintain this in your new location as much as possible. Although these rituals may appear insignificant they help you settle in your new location (e.g if you are accustomed to having breakfast at a certain time or you like to wash on a certain day then by all means do this).

– Issues with any type of relationships have always been very depressing. If it is not depressing for you, it may be for the other party or the children if there are any.

Some thoughts on relationships from my personal experiences and those of friends and relations whom I have interacted with:

o We all have a certain type of love for each other and that will always be there.

o For the deeper relationships (man/woman looking to settle down at some point) you cannot fall in and out love. If this is so, then it means that we really did not love that person to the extent of making a commitment. As someone person puts it – ‘you cannot be half pregnant’. When you say ‘I love you’ is this how you are feeling? Ten, twenty, thirty years from now would you still feel this way?

o Do you have fun together?

o Does this person respect you?

o Can you depend on this person?

o Do you see yourself in this person?

o Does this person love you?

o Can he or she look you in the eye and say ‘I love you’ without shifting their eyes?

o Do you have common goals?

o Do you love yourself? You cannot give something that you do not have.

o If you continually blame yourself for all kinds of things – I do stupid things, I am not smart enough, I am not worthy, I am not good looking or attractive enough etc. you are just putting yourself down. You do not need to have an air about you, but you need to appreciate yourself. You are worthy. You are great. You have skills and talents. The only person who know who you are is you so stand up and feel good about yourself.

o You cannot force or coerce people to love you.

o A relationship is like a house or a car if you do not maintain it, it would fall apart so you must be prepared to maintain the relationship once you get into it.

o Relationships take a lot of compromising. If you are not willing to compromise then you may have a few challenges.

o If you truly love someone you would not hurt them, and sometimes because your love is so deep, and they do not feel the same way, it may be better to let them go free.

o Sometimes you are so depressed over a relationship and the other party is enjoying life, not in the bit concerned about you. Then what are you doing to yourself? Your best option is to snap out of it and get your life back.

– If you find yourself becoming depressed because of illness you should seek medical help. The more you worry about your sickness, the more sick you will feel. It is so difficult not to worry. It has been said that most of our sickness are brought on by us – specifically our thoughts.

* If you think you are sick you will be sick. Lots of persons have been healed by changing the way they think about themselves.

* Find someone who you can trust to talk with about how you are feeling.

* Others have changed their diet and yet others have sourced alternative health care.

* Think of this – it is said we were made in the likeness of our creator. If this is so then we were not born to be sick.

* Start seeing your body being filled with love, light and life, and be thankful on a daily basis that you have a healthy body.

* Finally explore taking up a hobby . Find things that make you laugh and have fun.

Remember you alone know you, so trust yourself to snap out of being depressed, knowing that all things will work out for the best.

The above are my personal suggestions; they are in no way replacements for your medication. If you are on medication always check with your Doctor .

In the final article we will talk about some foods that may help with your depression.


Why Me? Series 2. How many people do you know would do this?

One Saturday night after attending a Christmas Party, we came home to the sound of water flowing in the drain at the side of our house. It appeared that a pipe had burst and since this was a regular event, and it was very late we retired.

Unknowingly to us, one of the Water and Sewerage Authority main water lines that pass through the empty lot overlooking our house had burst.

The next morning the water was still flowing, but while I was in the kitchen preparing breakfast, I was startled by a sudden loud noise and heard water gushing down our driveway.

I quickly peeped through the kitchen window to see what had happened.  To my astonishment there was a huge landslide at the top of the driveway and it was still coming down. I immediately called out to my husband and my son.

We quickly drove the cars from the garage and headed to the road outside of our house.  From the road we could see that a huge part of the empty lot that overlooks our house  had slipped and was now in our backyard and some of  it was also in one of our next door neighbour’s backyard.

There were also huge rocks still making their way to the back of our house.

The water which was shooting up in the air and down into the empty lot was eventually re-routed by a gentleman who lives on the other side of the neighbourhood.

We live in a valley. Our house is on one side of the hill and this gentleman’s house is on the other side.  Below is a view of his house from our porch. Look closely and you will see a pink and white house with a roof that looks like part of a triangle.

He must have looked out from his porch and seeing  the water shooting up with such force and recognizing  what was happening ran to his car and drove up to the empty property and placed the burst pipe in the road, so that the water could flow in the road instead of in the property.

We had never met this person before.  This was around seven thirty on Sunday morning. We know that the damage could have been worse if he did not turn re-route the water.

That morning, sitting outside on the steps in front of our house all I can say is : Why Me? Why us? Why did this have to happen to us?

The landslide dumped tons and tons of soil, debris and rocks at the back of our house and stopped a couple of inches away from the house.  Water tanks, fruit, vegetable trees and some flowering plants in addition to fences and railings  were all destroyed.

That day I was very concerned about going inside and even sleeping in our house since it was also raining heavily and this was causing more sludge and rocks to slide down.

I cannot remember ever praying so much. I kept telling myself this house is ours, it was through God we got it and we are not leaving. I know God was watching over us. Why would this guy who we do not know leave his house, early Sunday morning and drive to the other side of the hill to re-route the water from our house? Also he never came to our house. He did what he had to do and returned to his house. Amazing isn’t it? How many people do you know would do this?

Investigations revealed that the pipe had been leaking for a while, so when it burst, the soil was already saturated, leaving nowhere for it to go but down.

Thank God the Water and Sewerage Authority handled all the clean-up. It took a long time because of the volume of soil and rocks.

My husband and I did not take time off from work as our sons were home for the Christmas Holidays, but every day I would go home for lunch to see the progress. It was difficult to concentrate at work.

Just imagine an excavator at the back of this house and the only way to get there is up a steep driveway and up some steps, and there is another house at the side of the driveway.

The clean-up exercise was eventually completed on Christmas Eve just in time for Christmas celebrations.

This was the most  traumatizing event that has ever occurred to me and my family  and when I look back I realize that as a result of this event  I now have a  closer Relationship  with  God. I also got to meet the owner of the empty lot, and we got the opportunity to re-design our back yard.  We are also more aware of what is happening around us and around our home.

We all have troubles in some way or another.  I could have chosen to say where is God in all this, but I know deep down, that some way, somehow he is close by because of the things that happen that cannot be explained.

I would love to hear your ‘Why Me’ stories and what you learnt from it.

 

 


Motivation Tip – Love That Will Not Let Me Go

A lesson for us all even if we do not believe.

 

George Matheson was born in Glasgow, the eldest of eight children.  He had only partial vision as a boy.  By the age of twenty he was completely blind.  When his fiancée learnt he was going blind and that there was nothing the doctors could do, she told him she could not go through life with a blind man.

 

He never married.

He was helped by a devoted sister throughout his ministry.  She learnt Greek, Latin and Hebrew in order to aid him in his studies.  Despite his handicap, Matheson had a brilliant career at the Glasgow Academy, University of Glasgow and the Church of Scotland Seminary.

When he was forty years old, something bittersweet happened.  His sister married.  Not only did this mean that he lost her companionship – it also brought a fresh reminder of his own heartbreak.  In the midst of this intense sadness, on the eve of his sister’s marriage, he wrote one of the most popular and best loved hymns of the Christian church – ‘O Love That Wilt Not Let Me Go’.  He completed the whole work in five minutes and never edited, corrected or retouched it.  ‘This came,’ he wrote, ‘like a day spring from on high.’

O Joy that seekest me through pain,
I cannot close my heart to thee;
I trace the rainbow through the rain,
And feel the promise is not vain,
That morn shall tearless be.

Troubles are part of life.  Jesus faced trouble and so did the apostles, David, and all the people of God.  In each of the passages for today we read about lots of troubles.  However, as Matheson’s hymn beautifully articulates, troubles do not have the last word.

 

Restored after many troubles

Psalm 71:19-24

God does not promise us an easy path.  Life at times can be extremely hard.  The psalmist has seen ‘troubles, many and bitter’ (v.20).  His troubles, pressures and worries were not occasional or trivial.  They were numerous and serious.  He gives us a model of how to respond in these circumstances.

  • Keep trusting

It is easy to trust God when things are going well.  The challenge is to keep trusting in the midst of troubles.  David does not stop believing in the goodness of God: ‘Your righteousness reaches to the skies, O God, you who have done great things.  Who, O God, is like you?’ (v.19).

  • Keep hoping

Troubles do not last forever.  In the midst of his troubles, he has hope that at the end: ‘You will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up.  You will increase my honour and comfort me once again’ (vv.20b–21).

  • Keep worshipping

He keeps on praising God in spite of the troubles: ‘I will praise you with the harp for your faithfulness, O my God; I will sing praise to you with the lyre, O Holy One of Israel.  My lips will shout for joy when I sing praise to you – I, whom you have redeemed’ (vv.22–23).

Lord, there is no one like you.  Your righteousness reaches to the skies.  You have done great things.  Thank you that though we may see troubles many and bitter, you promise to restore our life again.  I praise you for your faithfulness.  My lips will shout for joy when I sing praise to you – ‘I, whom you have redeemed.’

 Taken from The Bible in One Year by Nickel Gumbel

15 Low Cost Ways to Stay Healthy and Young

I am now in my early fifties and I feel and look great and I want to help you feel healthy and young.

At one time I was in a job in the financial services sector and I used to spend most of my free time and money at the Doctor’s office.

I always had the flu, stomach problems, headaches, constipation etc., so I lived on antibiotics. If you are familiar with these illnesses you may have realized that these are all stress related. I struggled to balance work and family life in addition to completing my degree. My life at that time seemed to be in a bit of flux.

A friend introduced me to a book called “What Doctor’s Don’t Tell You About Vitamins”. I was very startled about the information provided in this book. I did some more  research on vitamins and took a course in Nutrition. Based on my research I started to take more vitamins and use foods that provide me with natural nutrients.

I used lots of  vitamin C, B, D and some of the  natural supplements I tried were – Noni, Acai, Goji, Aloe Vera. I also used the One minute Cure For All Diseases .  To these  I added   some simple floor exercises. As I continue to take these natural supplements and do the exercises  I realize that I no longer got the flu as often as I did and a number of the various aches and pains  had disappeared, and I was feeling great.

I no longer get the flu. I do not have any reflux. I really feel great. Now I  want to live, love and make a difference by helping other people like you feel healthy and young. I  see so many people my age and even younger struggling to stay healthy and young, and with the economy as it is we have no choice but to sacrifice health and looking good for other basic needs.  I am here to tell you there is hope. You can stay healthy and young  with these 15 low cost suggestions.

 

  1. Be constantly grateful to God for all that you have. After all he knows everything about you, so thank him every day for not only the big things but all the little things that he has provided for you.
  2. Always smile – this helps promote healthy cells. You can even laugh more. Do not take things so seriously.
  3. Be Positive – the more positive you are,  the more your body will feel and look better. Positivity also promotes wealth and good relationships. You have everything you ever need to live the life you want and you are worthy of this. Do not let anybody tell you differently.
  4. There is no need to take a dozen different supplements or tablets . Take one that has all the nutrients you need, except if you are anaemic.  I take chews4health. This is one chewable tablet with 16 powerful ingredients including the 4 super fruits – noni, acai, goji and mangosteen. It costs less than a dollar a day.
  5. Practice forgiveness – do not hold anything against anybody. Some research indicate that diseases may be the result of unforgiveness. So if you have not spoken to your sister/brother etc. for however long because of something they did to you, you need to take care of this by forgiving them. This also includes the Manager/Supervisor on the job who did not give you the promotion, or who did not like you or the co-worker who back stab you. Even add your parents to this, as some people may not have spoken to their parents for a while because of what their parents may have done to them.
  6. More and more research is showing that  coffee is good for you. If you love coffee, by all means have your cup of coffee but change your brand. I use Organo Gold coffee/mocha/chocolate/tea. These are infused with the Red Chinese Mushroom – Ganoderma. You can research  Ganoderma at pubmed.gov. You can get this cup of coffee for less than a dollar.
  7. Keep your body hydrated by drinking a lot of water. A glass or two 15 to 30 minutes before you have breakfast is a great way to clean out your system.
  8. Do not skip breakfast. This is the most important meal of the day. Be sure to include oats and some chai seeds or flax. These are excellent for the cholesterol  and for those with diabetes. Chai seeds also help to keep the body hydrated.
  9. Try to have your last heavy meal by 3.00 pm. Going to sleep with a full stomach increases your chance of storing up extra fat and puts more pressure on your body.
  10. Do some simple face exercises to minimize the wrinkles and wash daily with a Ganoderma Soap, which keeps the face clear and smooth. You can also try olive oil and lemon juice.
  11. Use the white of the egg once a week or every other week to minimize your wrinkles.
  12. At the first sign of a sore throat gargle with Apple Cider Vinegar in a little water.
  13. Find some simple floor exercises to do.
  14. Find your passion/purpose – we are all here to do something, help somebody or provide a service etc.
  15. Love like you never loved before – you are loved and have all the love you need so share it. In any case, you will not get love unless you give it away.

If you are serious about staying healthy and young let me help you, contact me at:

Josephine Harewood
1-868-620-8077

1-242-557-2077

email: joseylifeline@gmail.com
Website: http://joseylifeline.com

Healthy life style: http://www.justhealthy.organogold.com

  http://www.chews4health.com/teamtrini3


Living, Loving and Mattering

Some time ago I viewed a webinar hosted by Brendon Burchard and he asked ,

Are you really living, loving and mattering or making a difference?

I thought to myself, “Sure, I am living. I am breathing aren’t I?” Yes, I know how to love; I love my
husband, my sons and my mother and sisters. Certainly I feel as though I am making a difference as I try
to give back when I can.
After some time, the question kept resurfacing to the top of my thoughts.

Are you really living, loving and making a difference?

For years I got up around five a.m. every morning, with the same routine day in and day out. I
would prepare breakfast, ensure everyone is ready to leave for school or work. Find myself on the
job for 7.30 sometimes 8.00 am and return home around 5.30 p.m to resume the process all over.
During those years I also completed my degree which entailed longer waking hours and a struggle to
balance work, life and the studies. Over the last six years I got involved in some volunteer work which at
times seemed to be more stressful than actually giving back. At that time I assumed that I was making a
living and looking after my family and giving back. Now as I exit the corporate working world and enter
into a new stage of my life I am now thinking what is living anyway? What is it to really live?

As I continue to ponder on the question of living, I realized that we all are living but at a different level. I
know now that Living is enjoying what you do, being at peace with yourself and using your talents and
skills to give back. I know people who say that living is doing what they want when they want. For them it
is enjoying life to the max. Yet I have met others who stay in jobs that they do not like, they complain
bitterly about the boss, their co-workers and the company’s policies but they remain in the job. Their point
is that they have a job or they are making a living. I know because I have been there. I spent most of my
working years in the financial services sector. I never loved mathematics or accounts, but I had good
organization skills and I love to help people. I used to feel a deep sense of satisfaction when I see
somebody who I helped progress in the organization where I worked. I also always dreamed of having
my own business

To be truly living is to identify your true purpose and go after it.

The more I journeyed through life I realized that I did not know my true purpose. If I have to live I have to
know what to do to live., and I have to enjoy it. I do not just want to make a living, I want to make a
difference in people’s lives and I want to love with no biases. I look at the people I know and met and too
many people are just there. They are living but missing out on what life is all about. Some work
continuously on their 8-5 job, not enjoying the fruits of their labour. Others are so obsessed about their
job and making a living that all the money is being channelled into medical bills, because they are so
stressed. During my job experience I met people who were so wealthy yet I was amazed about their
health issues. Then there are others who are struggling with life, they are discouraged, have low self-
esteem, just moving with the flow or complaining about everything and everybody. They even take out
their problems on their loved ones. . Not realizing that there has to be another way. Yet we all are living.
We are all breathing the same air. What if these people knew their true purpose?

I believe that at some point we need someone to guide us along to discover what our true purpose is . I
also know that all things happen at the right time. Without the skills and experiences that I have acquired
over the years I would not have been able to use these to help anyone. Now I can help people using my
business, work and life experiences. So my question is are you truly living? Be honest with yourself. Why
are you here? Are you accomplishing what you want to achieve? What is it that puts a smile on your face
or that makes you feel that deep sense of fulfilment?

If you would like to explore these questions drop me an email – joseylifeline@gmail.com


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